Recently, I had a startling conversation with the organiser of a conference where I had given a research talk. I was told that having my pronouns, “(she/her/hers)”, written next to my name in the title slide of my presentation was not welcomed. This was a harsh reminder that even in 2019, stating one’s pronouns is still sneered at, and occasionally pushed-back against because it is perceived as opportunistic “political grandstanding”.
Pronouns (e.g. “he/him) are a vital component of our day-to-day and professional (English) language which identifies one’s gender. For transgender and/or non-binary people, it is a primary means of self-identifying their chosen gender. The intended effect of stating one’s pronouns is to make colleagues and students, particularly those who are transgender and/or non-binary, feel affirmed and at ease about stating theirs. Doing so avoids the awkward, and often painful, experience for them in being misgendered; i.e. being referred to by the pronouns of the gender in which they do not identify. It also avoids confusion around colleagues who are cis-gender (i.e. they identify with the gender assigned to them at birth) but do not conform to the gender stereotypes. This is hardly a political agenda but is simply a way of making conferences and universities more inclusive. In fact, my experience is that at conferences which embrace the inclusion of minority genders (e.g. by using pronouns on name tags, gender neutral restrooms and a code of conduct which protects minorities), there is rarely any tension around what trans and/or non-binary people can and cannot say.
As a university academic, I have seen the effects of misgendering and dead-naming (i.e. calling a trans/non-binary person by the name that they have abandoned) among colleagues and students. One of the saddest moments in my career was when one of the brightest of my tutees abandoned their degree because lecturers and support staff in the university kept misgendering and dead-naming them. For some of my colleagues, addressing them by “they/them” pronouns was too inconvenient; but for the student it was the difference between feeling accepted in the community or not.
Many of us are not accustomed to using “they/them” as singular non-binary pronouns. We may have seen these pronouns used more commonly in referring to individuals in the abstract in a gender non-specific manner. However, there is a wealth of linguistic evidence of the use of “they/them” in reference to singular, specific individuals. Non-binary pronouns are therefore no fad. As of the 18 September this year, the Merriam-Webster dictionary has incorporated “they” as a singular non-binary pronoun. Perhaps it is time that we, as academics, updated the language that we use in a professional capacity. It goes in line with the common principles of mutual respect and inclusion therefore to address non-binary and gender diverse people by these pronouns when they have asked you to do so. If in doubt, it is important to ask them for clarification on what their pronouns are. It is also important to remember that a trans or non-binary person’s chosen pronouns apply even when you refer to them in retrospect.
Having transitioned gender over the last few years, my own experience has been somewhat mixed. The vast majority of my colleagues have respected my request to be addressed by my correct name and pronouns. There have been a small number of colleagues who have continued to ignore my request. The pain of being misgendered or dead-named is very real and is often an awkward reminder of the continued intolerance of gender minorities at present day. It can happen in a moment of seconds, and often unexpectedly. Even when it is a slip of the tongue or simple ignorance, the impact is the same.
In academia, particularly in the biological and medical sciences, we work collaboratively and in teams or networks. Our greatest asset is the breadth of our networks of colleagues and collaborators. Misgendering and dead-naming has strained some of the oldest and dearest of my friendships. I have ended collaborations with those who subject me to misgendering.
In collegial environments, misgendering can extend well beyond the inappropriate pronouns. It is not uncommon for colleagues today to use gendered colloquialisms like “man”, “dude” or “bro” across all genders. Whilst most people can see the nuances in this type of language, this has the same impact as misgendering for trans women and non-binary people. I often reassure colleagues and friends that it is acceptable for people to make mistakes. Nobody is perfect. What is needed is some mindfulness of the language we use around our colleagues.
Repeated misgendering is quite damaging to the mental health of the victim. It is generally a refusal to recognise and respect the colleague or student in question. Misgendering and/or dead-naming in public or in group settings is a form of ‘outing’ of gender history without consent. Being outed can lead to some dire consequences for trans people, including being placed at risk of discrimination and hate-crimes at the hands of individuals with trans-exclusionary views. The UK law is a last line of defence for trans people in such situations. However, I personally find that stating my pronouns next to my name on my email signature or PowerPoint slides and being open to clarification is a much more effective and collegial approach to support trans inclusivity on campus and at academic events.
If you would like to make your workplaces and conferences inclusive to trans and gender diverse colleagues, you are welcome to state your pronouns regardless of whether you are cis or transgender. It is a strong act of solidarity which helps stamp out bigotry which is directed so often towards tans and/or non-binary people. The best part is that you can opt to use multiple types of pronouns (e.g. “she/they”) than pronouns specific to a single gender. Make it an opt-in system at your conference rather than force everyone to conform. Adopt a code of conduct which upholds equality, diversity and inclusivity.
If your university does not have one, work towards a policy document which protects the inclusion and safety of trans and gender diverse colleagues. Hold trans-awareness training sessions, at least for the leadership teams in your professional society, faculty and/or university. Watch this video on how to make your workplace safe and welcoming for all colleagues who are either trans or non-binary. It does not cost you any money or time to treat these colleagues and students with respect and address them by their chosen pronouns and name. Above all, be respectful, be kind.
This blog has been written anonymously. If you’d like to send comments, or if you are interested in writing about EDI-related topics, we welcome your feedback or pitches at comms@physoc.org . You can read more about The Society’s work on Diversity here; we encourage you to get in touch about your thoughts on this as well.